tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.comments2024-03-28T16:06:50.879+00:00FICTION on the WEB short storiesCharlie Fishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04834189452905372024noreply@blogger.comBlogger9558125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-19234611763177063002024-03-28T11:48:59.566+00:002024-03-28T11:48:59.566+00:00Thank you, JasonThank you, JasonJune Wolfmannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-1767487149355570892024-03-28T11:48:59.406+00:002024-03-28T11:48:59.406+00:00Thank you, JasonThank you, JasonJune Wolfmannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-46887157154856910992024-03-28T11:43:49.904+00:002024-03-28T11:43:49.904+00:00I love O’ Henry! Thank you, Rick!I love O’ Henry! Thank you, Rick!June Wolfmannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-55543776563949941272024-03-28T08:51:20.299+00:002024-03-28T08:51:20.299+00:00Nice story!Nice story!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-14351164171511236342024-03-28T08:17:06.703+00:002024-03-28T08:17:06.703+00:00As others have said, this is a creepy tale and als...As others have said, this is a creepy tale and also felt very traditional to me (in a good way). It has an element of the Edgar Allen Poe about it for its richness of description.Paul Khttps://paulkimm7.wixsite.com/paul-kimm/blank-1noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-86298603685879315652024-03-28T03:22:53.921+00:002024-03-28T03:22:53.921+00:00Thanks, Adam! I appreciate your commentThanks, Adam! I appreciate your commentAaron Schmelzernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-12901825907875776842024-03-27T18:28:27.529+00:002024-03-27T18:28:27.529+00:00If I had read this in high school, my classmates w...If I had read this in high school, my classmates would have murmured, “Heavy, dude!” And in a figurative sense it is heavy. The most remarkable thing about Masquerade is the vivid use of metaphors: “Elise finds herself crying, her throat the texture of gravel….” And “…tearing herself from the roots of fear…” I thought the use of “maggots” was just a little overused, but Aaron showed a wide choice of very descriptive words, otherwise. The story takes place more than a century ago, so I’m uncertain of the nature of Pat’s physical problems. It’s all muddled to me, but I think that reflects more my ignorance than anything. Character motivation is unclear to me, but I often find that is a point in the author’s favor. Perhaps a physician or a psychologist or a historian could explain this to me; Adam? Very interesting and good read, Aaron.Bill Topenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-73327036989001334202024-03-27T17:29:05.663+00:002024-03-27T17:29:05.663+00:00This was creepy!
You have hit all the beats of a c...This was creepy!<br />You have hit all the beats of a classic horror story with great precision.<br />Well done!Adam Strassberghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16649819811721479131noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-74064512790893773672024-03-27T16:50:20.351+00:002024-03-27T16:50:20.351+00:00Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it!Thank you so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it!Aaron Schmelzerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12807281985660440367noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-44065548650804258842024-03-27T11:33:42.808+00:002024-03-27T11:33:42.808+00:00Wonderfully creepy! The whole skin peeling is very...Wonderfully creepy! The whole skin peeling is very novel. The details are great, like this: “ Paint curls. Water stains mark the ceiling. Vague rectangles, once holding paintings that lined the hall. Before Pat and Hilda sold them. Those funds became food. That food has long gone. Spiderwebs are the new artwork” Thank you for this great creepy read!June Wolfmannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-56076849652610294772024-03-26T07:09:29.566+00:002024-03-26T07:09:29.566+00:00A nice, quiet story that I first read experiencing...A nice, quiet story that I first read experiencing some menace, truly expecting the eventual encounter to result in some sort of violence, which it did in an unexpected sort of way when James was driven to the mini-bar, which we've already been told, can't end well. I liked this for some of the reasons Paul K. mentioned above.Cliff Alipertinoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-88706124188175344622024-03-25T19:58:14.982+00:002024-03-25T19:58:14.982+00:00In my mind, the story coalesces if I believe that ...In my mind, the story coalesces if I believe that James and Jacob had a sexual dalliance during their hitchhiking episode forty years ago - though this is never stated explicitly in the story. To me, this makes the ending more manageable. Jacob is a Kinsey 1 and lived a primarily heterosexual life, whereas James is a Kinsey 6 and clearly has lifelong difficulties with emotional intimacy unrelated to his sexuality.<br />It is a rather haunting sad tale.<br />Adam Strassberghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16649819811721479131noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-33064480537591003652024-03-25T16:59:12.986+00:002024-03-25T16:59:12.986+00:00The prose in this story is very natural and strong...The prose in this story is very natural and strong. One only sees the tip of the iceberg of James's isolated life. An interesting read. Well done, Eamonn. Rozanne Charbonneaunoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-46622194961562808832024-03-25T16:10:00.107+00:002024-03-25T16:10:00.107+00:00This is a trial to see if my comment will be accep...This is a trial to see if my comment will be accepted. I can understand the choice of homosexual over gay, gay being a recent ambiguous term, homosexual being an established accurate term. The sexual orientation seems to be subordinate to the general lack of of connections and reason to be and as such does a good job of describing the condition. <br />Doug Hawley Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-87519843269104024082024-03-25T12:36:54.513+00:002024-03-25T12:36:54.513+00:00PS - if you have links to other pieces of your wri...PS - if you have links to other pieces of your writing, I'd be interested in reading more.Paul Khttps://paulkimm7.wixsite.com/paul-kimmnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-63596416451203261362024-03-25T12:33:28.101+00:002024-03-25T12:33:28.101+00:00At the risk of upsetting others, this is one of my...At the risk of upsetting others, this is one of my favourite reads on the couple of websites I regularly comment on in a while. The down-to-earth narrative style and the attention to details, combined with the little moments of prose poetry works so well for me. I found this story beautifully subtle and I particularly enjoy stories which don't answer all the questions, that don't conclude, don't wrap up nice and neat - because that's what life is and so in that sense, I loved the honesty and truth in this. In short, superb writing in my opinion.Paul Khttps://paulkimm7.wixsite.com/paul-kimmnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-90219693629397445642024-03-25T12:18:29.978+00:002024-03-25T12:18:29.978+00:00Such a classic story, masterfully written. But tha...Such a classic story, masterfully written. But that chilling ending… Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-38208051170327050162024-03-25T11:57:03.702+00:002024-03-25T11:57:03.702+00:00I found this a very easy story to relate to. I, to...I found this a very easy story to relate to. I, too, hitchhiked a fair bit, back in the same period, and have felt the loneliness James expresses. And, strangest of all, I often think back on such momentary acquaintances and wonder if a deeper connection might have been forged. I agree with Bill; your story raises quite a few questions, and leaves me intrigued. I wonder why James rejects the "gay" label, while accepting homosexual, for one thing. Is it that "gay" has, still, a certain implication of happiness that the MC does not share? Or is there some other point I've missed? The final, self-destructive, decision to open the minibar suggests a few possibilities, as well. Is he going to end up back at a hospital? Or will he, alone and lonely, end up succumbing to alcohol poisoning in the Holiday Inn, in a room with a view of a trash-filled car-park? One has to wonder if it is good to be so open-ended. Eolas Pellorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14391675963745309950noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-75269207227058456972024-03-25T11:55:39.340+00:002024-03-25T11:55:39.340+00:00This line: “ There was something in its air of dec...This line: “ There was something in its air of decay and desolation which sang sweetly to me.” I feel like the narrator has no social sense of direction. He longs for decay, and he longs for a relationship. But he can’t find hid way. He is a man with no compass, no true north. So he pursues this dead end, when he could be in Tuscany nurturing relationships and moving toward intimacy. But like his drinking…he is also drawn toward the morose. So his compass needle twirls between his loci of attraction, and he can’t move.<br />Great story!June Wolfmannoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-44900496748536670052024-03-25T10:17:27.993+00:002024-03-25T10:17:27.993+00:00I’m uncertain what to make of this tale. Is it a l...I’m uncertain what to make of this tale. Is it a longing on the part of James for what could have been? The same might be asked of Jacob who, after learning that the other man never married, leaps to the conclusion that James is gay. But they don’t belabor the point. The only thing seeming to tie them together was a fleeting three-hour sojourn many years before and a snippet of curiosity about the other. When does this story take place? Uncertain. James refers to photographing the space beneath his room’s window with a “camera” but that could well refer to a cell phone. It is an issue only where James’s “old school” view of homosexual vs. gay nomenclature is concerned. What doesn’t appear to be within the realm of possibility is the MC’s willingness to self-describe as queer. But these are questions best answered by the individual reader, and not the author. In the closing paragraphs of the story, James cracks the seal on what will probably by the first of many drinks from the mini bar; we can only conjecture why this is. Was the result of his meeting with Jacob so disappointing that he fell back into the comforting arms of oblivion. Again, a good story asks as many questions – more – than it answers. And this is a good story. Good job, Eamonn.Bill Topenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-8515619908426205092024-03-25T08:20:19.982+00:002024-03-25T08:20:19.982+00:00Beautifully written in a prosaic, but moving style...Beautifully written in a prosaic, but moving style that fits perfectly the sadness of this tale.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-35466369008555118092024-03-25T07:54:30.262+00:002024-03-25T07:54:30.262+00:00Hi Bill, thanks for reading and commenting on this...Hi Bill, thanks for reading and commenting on this story. Yes, Sophie is confronted with a very dysfuntional family. The parents, in order to cope with the failure, have picked Lucy as the scapegoat. Mr Jones's misogyny stems from a sense of threat in the changing world. Rozanne Charbonneaunoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-59086793534139386662024-03-25T04:51:47.694+00:002024-03-25T04:51:47.694+00:00Really enjoyed reading this!! I should confess tha...Really enjoyed reading this!! I should confess that Cameron writes is the best, I am waiting for your new book 😍Neshatnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-58541830019142827072024-03-24T17:48:01.974+00:002024-03-24T17:48:01.974+00:00Talia’s writing, like her theme, is rather breathl...Talia’s writing, like her theme, is rather breathless. We are led, by her skillful writing, to believe that the MC’s impressions and visions and dreams are affected by the altitude, the exuberance of conquering a peak, and by a cresting love. The more I read this story, the better I liked it. As Talia writes, the context of the adventure becomes “…a dreamscape…” It is very poignant how for the MC, the mountain becomes first a rival, then a partner, and finally, a nurturing lover. Excellent story, Talia!Bill Topenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-155197540326010032.post-49121965910867706472024-03-24T09:33:20.424+00:002024-03-24T09:33:20.424+00:00The ongoing adventures of Sophie was a delightful ...The ongoing adventures of Sophie was a delightful surprise as I read it tonight. Many issues were touched upon; for example, misogyny and cruelty and unremitting self involvement. Sophie once again made great strides in coming to grips with the vicissitudes of an era when women were very disposable, while at the same time quite essential beings. I love the ease and fluidity with which Rozanne brings Sophie to life by revealing her doubts, her fears and he innermost thoughts. Thanks once again, Rozanne, for some poignant, thoughtful and wonderful fiction.Bill Topenoreply@blogger.com